An unofficial, open letter to Apple.

Dear Tim Cook and company,

WTF? Seriously. WTF? I am unapologetically Apple. From the time I started earning my own money, I’ve purchased:

  • iMac DV SE
  • iBook 600/100
  • Numerous iPods
  • PowerBook 12″
  • Power Mac G5
  • MacBook Pro (2006)
  • MacBook Pro (2010)
  • MacBook Pro (2013)
  • Numerous iPhones
  • Numerous iPads
  • Numerous Apple TVs
  • An Apple Watch

I’ve been an Apple fan since our first Macintosh SE back in 1988, when my brother’s college required him to have one. So, I’m coming from a long history of Apple products.

So, that brings back me back to… WTF? You know, people still argue that Apple is lost without Steve Jobs at the helm. I don’t believe that. I do, however, think there’s no stern leadership saying “NO” to the stupid decisions. Jony Ive makes some beautiful products, but sometimes they suck for anything outside aesthetics. Cube, anyone?

The 2016 MBPs look very nice. The touch bar also looks cool and is mostly easy to use, from the bit of playing but, yes, I do have to agree with the crowd that these new boxes are way overpriced for what you get. Also, let’s get a physical Escape key put back. That key is used enough to not need to look up at the bar. I almost think the touch bar is a good idea, but poorly placed and implemented. It should almost be more of a trackpad thing. I’m good with the USB-C decision, but being stuck at 16GB RAM does kind of suck. Even more so (and this isn’t your fault at all), new Intel CPUs are no better than what they were 4 years ago. My MBP has an i7-4960HQ, and I’ve yet to see any serious benchmarking leaps with today’s i7-7xxx chips. This means that there’s no compelling reason to upgrade. It also means your 2013 MBP is an awesome piece of machinery! Finally, come on, now. Cheap, lightning-like cables for the power cable? Does that mean I’m going to have to replace the power cord now due to shoddy quality of the cable? I don’t trust that the power cord will be any good. Also, for close to $4k, no extension cord like we used to get? Who’s making these stupid decisions?

Adding to the MBP gripe a bit, I know someone who has had the keyboard on the new MacBooks and new MacBook Pros break. Apparently, this “butterfly” mechanism needs some perfecting. I’ve never had a laptop keyboard break. Look, there’s definitely a new MBP in my future, but not the shit that’s currently out. Get that battery better. Get that RAM up. Get that GPU up.

Mac Pro. WTF? I’m not even in the market for this (round) box, but clearly someone didn’t understand how pros work, and how they use their machines. Even I know, if I got a box like a Pro (or like my old G5), it’s because it was stupidly-easy to open and add/swap parts. I’m not even a hardware guy and that G5 was awesome. Instead, someone decided that the MP should look cool, and dark, and have lights (HP, anyone), but not be modular or expansive? Expensive, yes. Expansive, no, at least not without a million cables. And, it took you FOUR years to finally come to terms with this? Again, who is in charge and what are they doing?

iMacs and Mac minis. These just seem to be late to ship for inexplicable reasons. Ok, I can guess on the reasons. Also, stop with that “Let’s put a MacBook Air chip in the lowest iMac” shit. This is such a PC-maker move.

iOS stuff is great, except for location services. Fix that shit. If I ask for Main Street and I’m in Cherry Hill, NJ, it should find the closest Main Street in Cherry Hill and then expand outward. Instead, location services makes a horrible guess and starts in a different state (and sometimes even a different country). Who designed that god-awful algorithm? Also, iOS devices are not Mac replacements. In many scenarios, an open system, with an open file system, with an open ability to download whatever is preferable. Stop neglecting the Mac for iOS stuff. Spin up a different team, if need be.

Apple TV. You guys really keep missing the boat here. It has potential to be awesome, but I suspect the TV industry doesn’t like your negotiator. Shocker.

Apple Watch – Great device, but apps tend to suck for it. Not sure if this is due to SDK limitations, CPU limitations, or what? Hey, I want third party faces. I want someone to remake some of the watches I had growing up. Why this restriction?

Apple Pay – Awesome!

About the only news I hear regularly from Apple is its stance on transgendered bathrooms and the Apple Watch. I love my Apple watch and I don’t care who uses what bathroom. Apple – ship the f’ing products. Make them good. Tell Jony when his designs look awesome, but they suck to use. Also, it feels like Apple is catering to the “Look at all the new people to Apple with our cool iDevices” crowd, and ignoring the pros and faithful. Catering to the first crowd is ok in small doses, but ignoring the latter crowd is pushing aside the people that would have still supported Apple if they were going out of business tomorrow. NOT. SMART.

I think I’ve covered everything I wanted to rant about. Point is, as a longtime Apple fan, supporter, shareholder, etc., it feels like you’re dropping the ball and panicking. Go back to making GREAT products. Not everything has to be so thin that it requires new engineering feats just to work normally. I’ll gladly sacrifice my dividend as a shareholder if it means you’ll reaffirm your commitment to greatness instead of nonsense.

Oh, hey, while I’m at it. Why is it, on Windows, I can do “split screen” windows by DRAGGING-AND-DROPPING the windows to their positions and, on macOS, I have to make sure a setting is on in System Preferences first, followed by clicking and holding the green button, dragging to a side, followed by finding the other window to take the other side… but then if I close a window, the one window is full screen only…. Sounds like Microsoft trumped you on your own ability for drag-and-drop ease-of-use. Fix that.

Sincerely,

Angry-but-still-Apple-faithful-for-now

16bpb3FBFbSvfsvXKabf7C4Zwwgwpkc4vn – Bitcoin accepted to help me buy a new MBP one day. 😛

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