Anti-Apple tech journalists are retarded.

Inspired by this article here

I know the term “retard” gets a lot of people angry and upset, but it really applies to grown adults who remain ignorant, either on purpose or because their hatred for a company is so strong, they need to lie about it. It also applies to drivers where there are 75 signs that say merge right, and giant painted arrows on the road in the left lane pointing to the right, and every single brain dead idiot in the right lane switches to the left lane. If going left when words and signs point right isn’t retarded, well… perhaps this article will be too much for you.

Well, since we all know I love to beat a dead horse so much, we’re going to be an old dead due to the release of Apple’s latest stuff.

I have a friend who is vehemently anti-Apple. He doesn’t even have a good reason that I can see. Fine. People are allowed to like and dislike. That’s not even my problem. It’s the mental gymnastics he goes through to explain why Android is better or why “techies” prefer it. When I pointed out that the iPhone’s dual core processors were keeping pace with Android’s quad and octa core processors, the response was: Honestly I don’t even pay attention to the CPU stuff anymore because the benchmarks being used seem to be biased, so I can’t totally speak to this one.

Wait, I’m confused here. A die-hard techie is avoiding numbers and specs? Because this is the same guy who posted a meme making fun of Apple’s recent move to a 12MP camera when some Android phone had a 13MP camera. He’s also treating MP as the end all, be all to camera specs in the same way an uninformed computer person treats GHz on a CPU. Wow. Points lost, “techie.” He must be clinging to that 4GHz Pentium 4 to dear life, since it’s obviously better than any of these 2-3GHz Core i chips. OR… do the gymnastics kick in here and the brain flips to normal for a moment. We can assume so.

See what happens to my buddy when you suggest SIX minute abs. 😛

Hey, so-called techies writing for hit-whore-tech-sites-that-don’t-give-a-shit-about-facts:

I’m going to continue calling you out. I’m taking you to task. I will be naming your writers and your sites as completely inept and/or paid-by-companies to write favorable/fake shit. If you don’t want that, fire your current writers or, even better, GET SOME FUCKING ETHICS.

See what happens to my most of these tech bloggers and sites when you ask them about business ethics.

Finally, back to my favorite “go to” list of retarded Android (and Windows) scenarios.

  • Why does Android require 4 and 8 cores, each core running at double the “speed” of the iPhones 2 (now 4 in the iPhone 7) cores just to not have scroll lag and how is the iPhone keeping pace or beating it? It says more about the inefficiency of Android than anything else. I have never met a programmer who boasted he could write a 10-line program in 5000 lines of code, but Android hardware guys boast that their 8-core processor functions like a 2-core processor. Bravo, guys! 😛
  • Android phones still don’t come with the latest OS by default when you buy one and there’s no guarantee that you can upgrade either. Don’t worry, little lady. I know how to root these phones and get them upgraded. Maybe we can work out a deal, if you know what I mean. Android techie “white knights” out in full force to save the day.
  • Android phones require antivirus. Yes, yes. I know. We hear about the occasional Apple iOS hole. Well, any actual tech guy knows that all operating systems have holes and that security patches are a regular thing. Want a patch that Google released a week or month ago? Just buy a new Android phone. Or, work out a deal with the “white knight” as mentioned in my previous bullet point.
  • Android has neither the quantity benefit of Windows, nor the quality benefit of Mac/iOS when it comes to software. It also doesn’t have the backing of banking or third party companies. If developers want to get PAID for their stuff (and no, pennies from endless ads all over your app don’t count), they aren’t going to cater to the “ALL SOFTWARE SHOULD BE FREE” crowd in the Android camp.
  • Android and Windows guys ALL judge a book by its cover. Even if the iPhone 7 doesn’t look drastically different, they completely ignore the new tech inside. Really? Not impressed by the new ARM chip? Not impressed by the cameras? The dual lenses? The camera software? Did tech guys all of a sudden stop caring about this and just go with the “your mom” argument when you point out these advancements? Not even a “Yeah, that’s kind of cool” type comment because, you know, “FUCK crAPPLE!” You know why every new version of Windows looks drastically different? Because that’s the only way Windows guys recognize change. Hell, Windows guys are even ok with going from 8 to 10 because “BIG CHANGE!”

You wouldn’t tell a mechanic he’s a shitty mechanic if he didn’t drive around in a shitty car that constantly needed tweaking and his attention. You wouldn’t call a cop a wimp because he won’t live in the shitty neighborhoods he may have to patrol. Yet, pseudo-techies believe other techs aren’t real techs if they don’t choose the hard-to-update, hard-to-patch, still-requires-antivirus type operating systems.

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